I subscribed to my own posts when I opened this blog because that way I would ensure that I knew what the site was sending you. It seems it is now sending random email updates. I have been slowly pulling posts down, deleting many of the older posts and some of the newer ones, but my apologies for the blog now randomly springing into life with the intent to bizarrely email everyone out of the blue with old posts!
I have been very busy learning counselling skills, working with children who have experienced grief and loss and studying lately. I haven't one funny or interesting thing to share. Recently, I have been surrounded by the sort of people who remind me that there is also love in the world. Simple kindness and honest compassion, which are traits that I have not truly believed in for a while, have been soothing my weary and mistrustful heart. All of which is very healing, but does not make for interesting anecdotes.
I hope, Constant Reader, that you also have been surrounded by kindness, love and compassion.
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If you have harmed someone and wish to apologise, and genuinely believe that it might make the person you have harmed feel better, please do so.
However, please keep your apologies to yourself if:
Oliver Wendell Holmes had it right. Or at least this is what I take his quotation to mean:
What deluded narcissism leads you to believe that anybody apart from you places any great importance on your actions? Perhaps you should stop imagining that everyone thinks about you and your effect upon their life, incessantly. They don't. You're just not that important.
We are all narcissists to some extent or another. Some of us just hide it, or manage it, a bit better than others. But a self-aware narcissist is so much more palatable than a manipulative or passive aggressive one, wouldn't you agree, Constant Reader? Perhaps you have more comments on apologies you would like to add. If I missed any, I'm sorry. (Not really).
This is your Captain, Ace Ranty Pants McRanterson, thanking you for flying Righteous Airlines, where we right ALL the wrongs (or at least bitch about them), signing off for now.
* Oliver Wendell Holmes
I avoid the news, TV and whatnot like the plague it is, Constant Reader. It fills my head with angst and despair and I get very little in return. I download my awesome shows (Walking Dead, Hannibal and maybe a dozen more) directly to my laptop, thus avoiding dimwits who fondly imagine they are important and all the other appalling tat that passes for entertainment on the goggle box.
But here are some recent/ish news/popular items that filtered through on my Twitter feed. I wish they hadn't.
Basically, Twitter keeps me in the loop, like a hostage with Stockholm Syndrome. Note to self, unfollow the normals on your list and stick with the mentals, psychos, ex cons and deviants, they only ever tweet their long road to ruin, where they buried the bodies and why their meds aren't working. And thus RL** does not intrude.
Sometimes I sign petitions. Now and then I get involved and try. It generally leads to disappointment. Fuckwittery is like bubble wrap, you squash it down in one place and it pops up somewhere else. When in doubt, I send money. If you turn up at my door requiring food and shelter, you will get both. But no, torturing myself daily over the state of the world or tearing my hair out in clumps at sheer stupidity has never been a favourite pass time, and the older I get, the less I let myself care. It hurts too much and it's too fucking aggravating.
Those of you who are shocked by this and follow the news and spend your days chatting about such things and doing rallies and organising stuff and being all busy and important - I am happy for you if you imagine your caring will make any difference, at all, to the fucked up state of the world. It won't. But who am I to tell you what to do? Consider the source. And I get that it might help a person, singular, or even a few persons. But we are undeniably being washed away in a sea of fuckwits. We are swimming upstream against a tide of pure sewage yelling for it to stop like desperate, drowning King Canutes. I'm tired. I'm floating on my back from now on and will allow the cacophany of crap, the deluge of disaster, the sea of shite to drive me where it will.
Ness of Boganville's recent bucket list made me realise what I really, really want is to live just close enough to civilisation to get books, internet and vodka and far enough away to be able to keep ignoring all the crummy parts.
Never forget, compadres "Apart from pain, humiliation, failure, the unknown and death, we have nothing to fear but fear itself." ***
On that happy note, I'm going to watch some online shows. No ads, no presenters, and above all no news.
** The story by King/Bachman. Not the ridiculous movie.
** Real Life
*** Arnold Rimmer in Red Dwarf. Except I took out one of the words because he said it wrong.